Hey, Again?!!!

Hey, Again?!!!

Mix feeling and I couldn’t imagine that I’m doing it again. It’s been so long then since the last time I do this. Although many tells me that I have the guts for this is just that I still couldn’t attached to it so much maybe it complicates my work. Di ko alam.

I think that was six years ago since I tried to be one of the contestant from a prestigious clothing line body contest. The pictorials I’ve been through and those undertakings to be one of it are really a tiring and a mix emotion of doubt and happiness. Working out and be more of conscious on what you look like and those comment from your family and friends which the hardest part of it tells me that why am I doing this? Pabiro ko pa nga sasabihin na “jam sumali ako sa bikini contest ng _______” tawa lang at tanong na “bakit?” ang sagot but they don’t know na sumali talaga ko. After a call telling me that I passed the first step and inviting me to a go-see event it makes my worth tells that I can do it also even if I don’t have any person supports me. The sad part is at the time of the event I’m not there. I don’t know what’s on me and many times I do such thing of not finishing what I’ve already started. How stupid am I, Right? But the real reason is that I don’t have any family or friends to come along. I know kasalanan ko kasi sinekreto ko. So, ayun walang nangyari and I decided not to come and declined the invitation. Sayang pero tapos na eh. Nu pa magagawa ko. After that the last contest I’ve joined in eh yung sa Photo Contest. Not that to tiring kasi photo lang yun. Magpapasa lang thru net ng picture mo. Kaso walang kwentang contest pala. You can’t call really a contest for me.

Now I’m planning to do it again in other way around but still it looks almost the same just like the “AGAIN” I called it. Promise I will update you on it in some other time. For now, let’s enjoy life with what God given us. Morning and have a happy weekend to all.

Walking Alone

Lots of here maybe walking alone without knowing where to go or where they should go, a question linger in my mind. Can we really walk with the real meaning of being alone?

As I’ve watched the movie “Jesus of Nazareth”. I notice that Jesus never walk alone. Aside from having disciples, people who believes and some fellows who helps Him thru His journey still He never put to His mind that He’s alone. Maybe that’s why he never had sin all His life. My mind tells me to walk like Him but this question still in me.

It’s so easy for us to say that being alone could be stress out by the way you think life is. If you think you’re alone then you are but if you think you’re not then you’re not. While eating Sugo (mani yun mas masarap sa growers nyo hehehe) and watching the movie I noticed that many times on that movie I see lots of people seen Jesus miracles and lots of people walking with Him adores Him and really believes in Him. The time he lays His hands on to the cross I thought that Jesus walk alone on that time. Where are the people I’ve seen from the start? Does it explain that walking alone fails Him? Or it contributes on to others who walk alone too? On the end part of the movie and my last piece of my sugo(masakit na sa dila e hehehe) a narrator talks. I’ve been amaze the way he explain the question. I never thought that on that time my question will be answered that fast.

He said “sa lahat ng mga taong nangangamba at buong buhay na may takot magtiwala ka sa Kanya at ikaw ay kanyang sasamahan, ‘di ka nag-iisa at walang oras na Ika’y kanyang iiwanan”. …walang maliit at malaking kasalanan sa Kanya.. Magtiwala ka…at ika’y Kanyang patatawarin”.

Maybe it’s too harsh to say that it couldn’t hit me hard but it is. Some would say that “ano ba yun?” For me it only means that walking alone never exist and never been my path to choose because the real meaning of it is Him.

Minsan - Madalas by Cain Morales

Minsan may bagay na darating sa’yo
Minsan din may pangyayari na di mo akalain
Madalas nga yung bagay na yun di tama
Madalas pa nga yung panyayaring yun akala mo mali

Minsan tama, madalas mali
Tama ba na lahat ng minsan eh tama
At lahat ng mali eh madalas

Ikaw na nandiyan sa tama
Alam mo ba na ang mali ay ang inaakala mo darating sa’yo?
At ikaw na nandiyan sa mali
Alam mo ba na ang tama ay ang pangyayaring dumating na?

Sa bawat mali na madalas mong ginagawa
Alam mo rin ba na sa ibang tao eh tama ito?
At sa bawat tama na minsan mong ginawa
Alam mo rin ba na sa isip ng iba madalas mo itong ginagawa?

Nung maisip mo na tama ka at mali ako
Naisip mo rin ba na di lang ako ang mali?
Nung minsan na magkasama tayo alam mo ba ang mga mali ko
Eh nung madalas tayo magkasama alam mo ba mga ginawa kong tama?

Sa bawat araw na dumating ang madalas kong isipin ay ang bawat mong nararamdaman
Sa oras na darating pa tama na sakin na minsan mong maisip na nandito ako.
At sa bawat araw na darating pa alam ko na may mas maganda pang darating
At sa bawat oras na darating pa alam mo na nandito lang ako.

Why Do We Need To Lie?

Everyone have this feeling wherein you couldn’t easily tell what’s really on your mind. Sometimes you just need to lie or do thing or tell something that makes it easy to understand, on the other hand why is it many times we need to complicate things? Is it really a human instinct to lie? And complicate things?

I mean it and I can say it that I’m one of them for a reason that I really don’t know. I just know the consequences of lying. It may ruin a friend life, destroy a family and trust on people as well as to God. Am I correct?

Okay I will explain my side, for me lying has been my way of releasing my stress on things that complicates my life. Oops!!! Why is it like that? Many questions will grow on my manner of reasoning, I know that and I know also that you didn’t agree with me. Just want to tell all my friends and to you to that I’m sincerely sorry for lying and complicate thing that complicates you to understand me. Sooner or later, promise I will do my best not to do that again and in time I’ll correct all the mistakes I’ve done.

UPDATE KO : Mang Nico's Blessing

Ah lapit na ang blessing ni Mang Nico..Kasabay nya si Lolo Jose.. March 14, 2009, 4pm sa Dau Chruch, Pampanga. Papakilala ko na sya. Invited ko kayo lahat hehehe.. Pero don't expect na ganun ka bongga ang blessing kasi lam nyo na...hehehe.. Di naman importante yun di ba? Ang mahalaga blessed na sya.

Wala sa family kong aatend. Di ko alam. Para kasing wala lang naman sa kanila na meron akong na achieve na ganun. Quite sad and dissapointing but on the other part masaya 'cause lot of my friends still appreciate it.

Magaanak pa nga ako sana ng binyag nun kaso di p'edeng wala ako sa blessing nya. Ayoko mawala. Tagal ko kaya hinintay yun. Di naman ako excited noh? lol..Hey medyo lang!!! hehehe..

Regarding sa darating na holyweek. Okay naman na..

May karosa na. Hiniram sa isang malapit na kaibigan. At sana di na magbago ng isip. Sa damit naman may nag sponsor para sa susuotin nya. Sa mga bulaklak bahala na. Pero madali na siguro yun.

Di ko pa din alam kung meron sa family ko na makikiprusisyon. Pero im still hoping. Siguro naman, diba? Wala naman silang gagawin nun for sure. Unless kung mag-a-outing sila na tradisyon na din ng family ko pag hoylweek. O kaya naman kanya-kanya ng lakad. Or manuod ng buong season ng smalville o kaya naman ng prison break na gawain ko din dati pag holyweek.Hehehe.

Hope to see all you there.....

Girl Be Mine

Last 2 weeks ago.. Nag open ako ng playlist ko.. Di ko makita yung kanta na girl be mine. Di ko kasi maalala kung sino kumunta nun pero alam ko kilala ko yun pag narinig ko ulit. May nagsabi sakin na si Francis M yung kumanta.. Napasabi ko lang na “Oo nga pala.. May memory gap na ako”.. hehehe.. Naalala ko yung time na nauso yung kanta. Uso pa nun casette tape lang.Sosyal ka pag may CD ka na nun. Madalas na naririnig ko yung kanta na yun nuon.. Pero bakit ganun nakalimutan ko pa din? I like Francis M. The way he express his feeling through his songs.. Galing. Saka cool na cool.. I Never thought na he passed away that easy. Easy kasi after 7 months na nalaman na may cancer sya eh ayan wala na sya. Yung time na pinapakinggan ko yung “Girl Be Mine” sinasabayan ko pa. Pakanta kanta lang.. Never mind sa kung anong silbi nung kanta.. basta ma entertain ako.. tapos.. Di ko naisip na yung time din na yun eh yung singer na pala yun e may sakit ng nararamdaman. Saka wala naman ako pakialam. Ganun naman tayo diba? Paki ko.. Kaano ano ko ba yun… Ganun naman diba? Ngayon, pinapakinggan ko ulit yung kanta.. Narealize ko na yung kanta represent Francis M’s legacy at success nya nung time na nabubuhay sya. Ikaw ba? Naisip mo ba kung may mga bagay ka nang nagawa para sa sarili mo o yung tipong may masasabi ka ba na success mo ‘tong time na nabubuhay ka pa? I was thinking of this, while listening to “Girl Be Mine”. It make sense for those who appreciate little things you do eh pano yung iba na never nag appreciate ng bagay na nagawa mo? Basta ba kakalimutan ka na lang nya? Haaaaayyy… life is unfair… Unfair ’cause you don’t have the same situtation or same life to live in. Girl Be MIne - Francis M - Me - You - All of us have the right to welcome and be appreciated…

GIRL BE MINE by Francis M

let the sun shine
let the rivers run away
coz its a beautiful day now
to play now
as i close my eyes and pray
lord have mercy on me
coz im feeling kinda lonely
would you be
could you be
my one and only

took a train at a station
and almost lost my patience coz i was waiting
damned rain delayed the train
now im waitin in vain
just to see your face
is this the one that im supposed to be afraid of
is this the one that im supposed to be ashamed of
hard as a rock not soft like play-do
everytime i hear a song playing on the radio

let the wind blow
let the wind touch my face
i wanna take a little break now
shake now
this is what i have to say
i feel so fine
so fine that it blows my mind
tell the truth
when will you be mine

and in my dream you are so real
so it seems
inside my head a giant screen
plays every scene
while i scream
i feel you everytime i go to sleep
wake up in the middle of the night
and i weep
gotta be mine
that girl is so fine
girl be mine
girl be mine
all it takes is a matter of time

and in my dream you are so real
or so it seems
inside my head a giant screen
plays every scene
so you see
i feel you everytime i go to sleep
all it takes is a matter of time
tell the truth
will youl be mine

sun shine
let the rivers run away
coz its a beautiful day now
to play now
as i close my eyes and pray
lord have mercy on me
you know im feeling kinda lonely
could you be
would you be

let the wind blow
let the wind touch my face
i wanna take a little break now
shake now
this is what i have to say
i feel so fine
so fine the it blows my mind
tell the truth
when will you be mine

let the sun shine
let the rivers run away
coz its a beautiful day now
to play now
and as i close my eyes and pray
lord have mercy on me
you know im feeling kinda lonely
could you be
would you be
could you be
would you be
could you be
would you be
be mine

Mang Nico is here!

Lapit na Holy Week at for sure busy ako nun lalo pa’t meron na kong representative na isasali sa prusisyon. Oo, sa wakas yung project ko na matagal na eh ayan tapos na.

Nagkaron na ako ng my own SAINT. Saya diba? Pero siyempre di mawawala jan yung mga taong tumulong sakin. Si Tosh utol ko at ang barkada. Sila naman talaga ang dahilan kaya natupad din si Mang Nico eh.

Last February 28, 2009 3:00 PM natapos sya at kinuha sa Shop sa may Betis, Pampanga. Walang kotse kaya naisip ni Tosh na I-tricycle na lang. Pagdating na pagdating ko sa Pampanga galing Manila pa kasi may pasok ako nung Saturday na yun. Duon agad kami pumunta. Tirik ang araw at open ang tricycle na naarkila pero may twlaya naman kaya okay pa.

Super excited ako that time. Kasi makikita ko na sya. Pagdating dun. Sumalubong si Misis Dominga ang gumawa. Sa totoo natuwa ako sa kanya kasi di ko akalain na magkakaron ako nun. Saka sino ba ko para magkaron ng kagaya nila Tosh na meron ng San Jose. Binayaran na ng full payment at saka uwi na agad sa Dau. Bahay nila mama at Tosh.

Sa bahay, dami na disappoint sa itsura nya. Nung una di ko gets kasi kapampangan ang usapan nila. Di pala nila nagustuhan si Mang Nicos at maraming kadahilanan na kesyo payat daw ng muka at kalbo. Personally nasaktan ako kasi syempre diba?

Pinahiram sya ng damit galing kay Lolo Jose. Nakakagulat kasi nag iba talaga ang itsura nya. Yung payat na payat at kalbo na Santo ayun bihis na bihis at napaka ganda.

Ang galing. Palagi ko nga tinitingnan kasi parang palagi sya nakatingin sa’yo pag andun ka malapit sa kanya.

It’s too refreshing knowing that you accomplish something that you always wanted to have.

Totoo nga na pag humiling ka sa Kanya. Higit pa sa hiniling mo ang ibibigay Nya.

I never expected to have Mang Nico this year na. It’s just only a plan for some other time, maybe next year pero ta’mo andyan na sya. Diba sobra naman?